I was able to call the New England Patriots office and arrange a faux interview with Bill Belichick. Belichick (BB) would speak with me only on the condition that I gave him my old, cut-up ESPN The Magazine sweatshirt.
I asked him a series of questions trying to get insight into his peculiar personality.
Based upon your recent press conference, it seems obvious you like the movie My Cousin Vinny. What are some of your other favorite movies?
BB: Eight Men Out, 21, The Sting
Who is your favorite U.S. President?
BB: Richard Nixon
Who is your favorite Wall Street personality?
BB: Bernie Madoff
What is your favorite quote?
BB: Rules are made to be broken.
What is your favorite quote by a celebrity?
BB: Bill Clinton “…I did not have sexual relations with that woman …”
Who is your favorite baseball player(s)?
BB: Barry Bonds, Mark McGuire
Who is your favorite non-football athlete?
BB: Lance Armstrong
Who is your favorite female athlete?
BB: Rosie Ruiz
Who is your favorite youth athlete?
BB: Danny Almonte
What is yout favorite song:
BB: Me and Mrs. Jones by Billy Paul, later remade by others, including Michael Bublé.
What is your favorite color:?
BB: Anything opaque, maybe black
Do you have anything else you’d like to say?
BB: When do I get my ESPN The Magazine Sweatshirt?
Ahhh! Now I understand!
(Obviously a fake interview but it was fun to think about 😉 )